moving to Michigan

tl;dr, I got a fellowship in Interlochen. Also, apparently, I'm insecure.

July 20, 2025

perhaps the update i had been looking forward to. i got an offer -- an unexpected one. starting September, i'll be a fellow at the classical music radio station up in Interlochen, Michigan, living across the street from Interlochen Center for the Arts. it's terrifying, but this was the same feeling i got when i decided to embark on a fellowship to Malaysia two years ago. it became one of the most rewarding experiences of my life. i won't be making too much money, but i'm offered free housing, amenities, and 3 meals a day.

it's strange, though; perhaps because this fellowship is different from what i've applied to elsewhere, when i got the call and heard "so are you ready to pack your bags and move to Michigan?", all i felt was, "oh, i got the offer. hmm, now i have to tell the internship people i can't do it anymore. hmmm...can i survive a year up in Michigan without any of my familiar ties?" and while i am grateful to have the year figured out, i realized that job search is, in a sense, a lifelong process. i'll still have to send out those cover letters and resumes, especially since this a fellowship.

but i'm excited because Interlochen is Interlochen and it's a famous classical music academy (aka, story inspiration). i get to go to concerts and experience four seasons and get out of California for a while. i'll be logging my experiences on this blog. this will be my first year living alone, outside of California but still within the US! it probably means i can't date anyone for another year, but i suppose...that's not terribly important right now.

it's funny, too: the interview went well because i stopped caring too much. my interview skills are back once the pressure to succeed is off my shoulders.

-- a quick rant:

i am decidedly insecure about being an artist -- i'm sure it's apparent at this point. i grew up a competitive student. today i looked at some of my college acceptance letters and realized in another life i would have graduated UC Berkeley with a degree in Materials Engineering. except i decided to take this path, this winding, uncertain, nontraditional path that doesn't pay 6 figures out of college. when i told one of my peers about my dream of creating a Netflix show with AAPI classical musicians, he mocked:

him: Sure one of my goals is also for a big company to pay me a lot to do a thing I’d want to do anyway
me: At least my goal sounds interesting.
him: Right so I think being a bio major mine is cure Parkinson’s or something useful but I’m sure your thing is good too
me: Such scorn for artists, what a hater
him: As if it’s unearned

even if i know it's a joke, the life i dream about is unfortunately probably a laughingstock some of my peers. and by extension, the part of me who is competitive, who would have majored in STEM for the prestige, wilts with an ego death.

i told him that i'd rather live my life with decidedly less pay than live half a life wishing i took another path.