so tell me a little bit about yourself

May 22, 2025 (5 days after graduation)

i'm a recent graduate who majored in media studies and music. i consider media and music my two core passions. on the media end, i have done marketing, communications, journalism, and branding. two years ago, i was a marketing and distribution intern for [redacted], where i wrote blog posts, promoted the organization's films, and used the org's digital archival materials to write about their 50-year history of [redacted] distribution. last summer, i was a studio intern at [redacted], where i wrote content for their newsletter...i'm getting bored even talking about myself like this.

i don't want to go into marketing. i think it's boring and shallow (and stupid) (apologies to anyone reading this who is passionate about marketing), and the types of corporate storytelling involved (even if it's not an actual corporation) are cheesy. i'm not here to beg people to give me money. i'm not here to beg others to give an organization money.

well, i still need a job, so i guess i'll have to invent myself. last night i tried to think clearly, which is an impossible action because the act of thinking is unclear and always abstract, and i feel the weight of boredom of exhaustion disintegrating my thoughts before i've even had a chance to acknowledge them.

a few nights ago i wrote in my journal:

If the academic semester is tonal, the past several days following graduation are twelve-tone. There is no resolution, only an ending. There is repetition with unpredictable variation. There is no key, no pitch center, no central event my time is structured around, only the long stretches of early summers spent in my room.

i realized while talking to professors that i'll need to go back to grad school at some point. "need" might be an inaccurate term here; i want to go back to school because i want my life to be about ideas and intellect. i want to be known for what i create and write.